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Author Archives : Leanne Oaten

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17.Jun, 2020 Comments Off on What is Gaslighting?

What is Gaslighting?

Gaslighting is an attempt to confuse and minimize your feelings and reality, to deflect heat onto you, and evade the consequences and feeling the shame of misdeeds and mistakes. It is a form of emotional abuse and manipulation. It is the most often used tactic of those with narcissistic traits…

8.May, 2020 Comments Off on Growth vs Victim Mentality in a Narcissistic Relationship

Growth vs Victim Mentality in a Narcissistic Relationship

You cannot transform your life with a victim mentality.   So much of what is out there today on narcissistic abuse is heavily rooted in victim mentality.     There are some who say it is ‘victim blaming’ or ‘victim shaming’ when I share my views on taking a growth…

8.May, 2020 Comments Off on Growth Mindset in a Narcissistic Relationship

Growth Mindset in a Narcissistic Relationship

You cannot transform your life with a victim mentality.   So much of what is out there today on narcissistic abuse is heavily rooted in victim mentality.   There are some who say it is ‘victim blaming’ or ‘victim shaming’ when I share my views on taking a growth and…

6.Apr, 2020 Comments Off on The Narcissistic Abuse Cycle in Action

The Narcissistic Abuse Cycle in Action

A Crazymaking Covert Narcissistic Abuse Pattern You Have Come to Know In this Blogcast, I’m sharing a story (with permission) that perfectly illustrates what the covert narcissistic abuse cycle looks like and what you may be feeling when you’re in it.  Here is the story: “I signed up for the…

4.Apr, 2020 Comments Off on 6 Phases of Transformation in a Narcissistic Relationship

6 Phases of Transformation in a Narcissistic Relationship

  You are in a relationship with a narcissistic spouse, and you want to know if he can change.   I feel you, and my heart goes out to you. You have history, a business, family, home, children, a life with this person, and your dream life is not turning…

5.Feb, 2020 Comments Off on To the Woman Who Has Lost Her Voice in Her Relationship

To the Woman Who Has Lost Her Voice in Her Relationship

After a powerful group coaching call with my ETC members today, this blog post came to me after guiding the women on the call to stepping into their power and setting new boundaries to put a stop to the unbelievable treatment they are tolerating from an unconscious, abusive partner.   …

6.Dec, 2019 Comments Off on The Cycle of Covert Narcissistic Emotional Abuse

The Cycle of Covert Narcissistic Emotional Abuse

The hallmark of an abusive relationship is the cyclic nature of the phases, and predictability of the tactics and patterns.   Abuse takes many forms, for the sake of this blog post, I am referring to covert emotional/narcissistic abuse.   For women in this type of relationship, the cycle isn’t…

2.Oct, 2019 Comments Off on How to Break Free From Victim Mentality in Toxic a Relationship

How to Break Free From Victim Mentality in Toxic a Relationship

The Only Way to Truly Heal is To Shift Out Of Victim Mentality and Into Empowerment   I’ve had to reflect on the words and message I want to convey in this post, because to be honest, all of my personal and professional experience as a therapist has led me…

26.Sep, 2019 Comments Off on Emotional Abuse Awareness Guide: How to Know if You’re In an Emotionally Abusive Relationship

Emotional Abuse Awareness Guide: How to Know if You’re In an Emotionally Abusive Relationship

  How to Know if You’re Experiencing Emotional Abuse in Your Relationship We are all capable of saying hurtful things and behaving in ways that can be harmful to another at times.   Anyone can exhibit emotionally abusive behaviors under certain circumstances.   But, what is considered to be emotional…

17.Sep, 2019 Comments Off on How to Know if Your Relationship Can Be Saved

How to Know if Your Relationship Can Be Saved

  If you are experiencing ongoing emotionally destructive patterns within your relationship, you will find it near impossible to focus, be productive and stay in your creative flow.   My mission from day one of my work as a counsellor has been to empower women to stand up for their…