When you are truly ready to change your life, you will stop asking everyone for their advice, and just go for it.
This might sting a little, but sometimes (most times) our friends, family, and even our spouse aren’t the best people to go to for advice. Especially with the big stuff.
They will tell you to be careful, and to play it safe. You may hear “that’s just ridiculous”, “that is unrealistic”, “what are you thinking”?, “how are you going to pull that off”? “That’s too much money” etc..
When you truly are ready to change your life, you get to this place of trusting yourself, your decisions, your investments and choices, you don’t need 10 people to tell you what they think.
Sure, sometimes we want perspective, so choose 1 person if you must, that you know will give it to you straight, push you out of your comfort zone, and tell you to go for it.
A friend who is kicking ass, or a coach/mentor that will challenge you out of your comfort zone.
Enmeshment is where we lose ourselves. Being enmeshed with family members and/or our partner means that we don’t feel like we can make a decision or live our lives apart from what they may think and want.
This is a sign of weak boundaries. And when we don’t have healthy boundaries, we lose who we are.
If there is a big freaky leap you are considering taking, but you keep going to your pals and family – the ones who aren’t taking any big scary leaps themselves – for advice, you will hear some version of the their own fear being projected at you, which will trigger you to shrink back, and stay comfy.
I have a client who really wanted to invest in working with me. It was a scary investment for her. And more she had ever spent on herself at one time, that was all about her.
She was ready to change her life, and knew I was the one who will help her do this.
I heard a common response once we got through the consultation “I have to talk to my husband first”..a common excuse I hear that takes the decision making off of them, and drains their personal power.
I coached her to make this decision on her own, without going to her husband, and to tell him afterwards, once he started to see the dramatic shifts and changes with her.
This is empowerment.
She told me that she knew she needs to do this for herself first, her kids and marriage second.
She was an exception, because many that use this reason to say no to themselves, never go for it.
They shrink back and get drawn back in to the dynamics of those around them that project their limitations on to them.
I share this with you to demonstrate the importance of self trust.
I have made many financial investments for my personal growth and health, as well as in my business, funds that I created from my work.
I am not saying be irresponsible with money, and not to discuss big investments with you partner.
What I am saying, is there is a way to do that says, “I have decided I am going to do this program. I am figuring out a way to make it happen for myself, I just wanted you to be aware of it. I would love your support, but regardless I am taking this step for my own growth, success, health, whichever it may be”.
I did not ask permission for the times I joined programs my hubs knew nothing about (until after I committed). I did not ask my parents first. I did not ask my husband if it was OK.
There is a case to be made here (for another day) that the importance of women having their own resources and access to funds is critical to self empowerment, but again, that is a whole other topic.
At the end of the day, we need to get empowered in all areas of or life in order to heal and become whole.
So many women who are stuck in adrenal fatigue are not living in their power, and this was surely the case for me as well.
When we choose to carry ourselves from a place of power, our body starts to heal.
So I will leave you with this: Where are you acting from a place of powerlessness?
Where do you feel the need to ask permission from those in your life about your decisions?
What will you do to change this, and act from a more empowered badass version of yourself?
PS if you are ready to step into your FULL power, change your life, get on the waitlist to become a client in 2020. Apply by clicking the button below.